How to Build Friendship Skills in Pre-Kindergarten: A Parent’s Guide from Newtown Friends School

12/4/2025

For many families, Pre-K is the first time their 4-year-old will step into a more independent social world, and that can bring up a mix of hopes and questions.

Will they make friends? Will they feel comfortable joining in?

Young children learn these skills gradually as they play, test ideas, and interact with classmates. In the Newtown Friends School Pre-K program, teachers guide students through these early steps in ways that feel natural and encouraging. When families practice similar skills at home, children feel even more ready to connect with their peers.

Your Child Needs Tools

At this age, many children want to join in but are still learning the words to use with a peer. Practicing short, friendly phrases at home helps them feel more prepared when they walk into the Pre-K classroom.

Try prompts like “Do you want to play?”, “Can I help?”, or “What are you working on?” Your child hears how to start a conversation and begins to understand what friendly language sounds like.

Role-play can help too. You might use stuffed animals to act out how to ask for a turn, join a game, or respond when someone says no. Keeping it playful makes practice feel easy.

Once children have a few phrases to lean on, they still need time to warm up around classmates. That’s where parallel play comes in.

Your Child Needs Warm-Up Time

Your child may build with blocks beside a classmate or draw at the same table without saying much. This quiet, parallel play helps them feel comfortable around others before they’re ready to interact more directly.

As children settle in, they often start watching what classmates are doing and may try joining for a moment or two. These small steps are signs that your child is warming up socially and beginning to feel ready for shared play.

Teachers at Newtown Friends School encourage this stage by creating inviting spaces where children can explore near one another at their own pace and then naturally begin to play together.

That progression is a beautiful thing to watch at home and at school.

“Pre-K students are going through one of the most incredible developmental stages,” said Kate Weiler, Pre-K teacher. “They are learning to make friends, form connections, take responsibility for their actions, learn to regulate their emotions, and love themselves for who they are. I am so lucky to get to act as a guide and partner for students as they navigate these foundational moments.”

Your Child Needs Consistent Practice

Of course, children don’t learn social skills after one try. They learn them the same way they learn everything else in Pre-Kindergarten — by practicing a little at a time, day after day. That steady repetition is what helps friendships start to take shape.

At Newtown Friends School, this practice happens throughout the day in small, meaningful ways. Children greet one another, play in the Nature Explore Classroom, work beside a classmate, or ask for help. These moments aren’t big on their own, but together they help children feel more confident reaching out to others.

You can support this at home in simple ways, too. Choose one or two parts of your day where connection naturally happens, like when you’re helping your little one get dressed or during snack time. These calm moments give your child a chance to take turns and express their emotions, which strengthens the same skills they’re using at school.

As your child practices in both places, you’ll likely notice changes. Maybe it will be a new willingness to say hello, a softer reaction when something goes wrong, or a growing interest in talking about classmates. Those are signs that all of their practice is working, and they are beginning to reflect the goals of our International Baccalaureate Primary Years Program, which encourages children to become thoughtful, confident members of their community.

Your Child Needs Support When Things Are Hard

Still, even with steady practice, friendships will have bumpy moments. A friend might say no to an invitation, someone might grab a toy too quickly, or a game might end before your child is ready. These experiences are part of growing up, and children often need help understanding what happened.

One helpful way to support your child is by talking through what you notice. Instead of correcting or judging a situation, you might say something like, “I noticed she looked frustrated with her puzzle, so I asked if she needed help,” or “I noticed he was talking to someone, so I waited for my turn.” Narrating your thinking this way helps your child learn how to read a situation and respond with care.

You can do the same when your child is having a big feeling. A calm observation like, “I noticed your hands tightened when that happened,” or “I noticed you walked away for a minute,” helps your child feel seen without being pushed. It gives them room to talk about what they felt and why.

Toys can help here as well. Stuffed animals or action figures make great stand-ins for practicing how to ask to join a game and what to do when you feel left out. Books about friendships add another layer of support, giving you a natural way to talk about how characters treat one another.

Teachers at Newtown Friends School use these same gentle strategies because they know that friendship takes time, and children grow steadier with each chance they get to try again. When you support these small steps at home — and your child experiences the same kind of peaceful guidance at school — relationship skills start to stick. Over time, you’ll see their confidence grow as they learn how to work through challenges and enjoy being part of a community.

Experience our Pre-K for 4-Year-Olds in Newtown, PA, for Yourself

If you’re ready to learn more about our Pre-Kindergarten program and meet the teachers who guide this growth, we invite you to visit.

Schedule a Tour

Back